The Saran Sisters Discuss Life Sentients

or redundancy serves no one

by Patsy Alford & Christina Burress

   What!        Everything is sentient!

                            --Pythagoras

If everything is sentient, why say sentient beings? beings ought to cover it. To me, to say there are sentient beings means there are some non-sentient beings. Two kinds: Ing and non.

I have planted the sentient garlic and weeded the sentient weeds out of the sentient strawberries. I have made my sentient hands dirty with sentient dirt. I have made my sentient back tired. And I worked on my sentient mother-in-law's sentient memoir.

How goes the sentient tuteeeee? Sentient I, sees sentient your, point?

Now I have made sentient plum jam from the sentient plums my sentient friend Madeline brought me yesterday. Good on sentient crackers.

I had sentient tuna over sentient lettuce, sentient tomatoes, and sentient green onions. Then I cut a sentient pineapple's head off and sliced off its sides then ate it with a fork.

My tutee is only barely sentient. He is a teenage boy taking heavy duty mechanics at college while finishing his Grade 12 English on the weekends. He sits and yawns. His eyes glaze over. But he is a nice kid and we are coming along.